Piss Tester Wanders through City

Ubon Ratchathani – A strange man wandered through the city of Ubon posed as a police officer, asking civilians for urine samples. He claimed to be helping police in fighting drug use when he himself appeared to be on drugs.

Civilians informed the police station in Ubon Ratchathani, doubting the strange man who had asked for their urine.

Police followed the man to a restaurant and observed his bizarre methods of drug testing. Firstly, he would ask everybody to piss into their cups then he would take out a pen and dip it into the pee. Civilians reported that the man said it was a technically advanced pen that told him whether the person had been doing drugs or not.

When arrested for impersonating an officer, he claimed to only have wanted to help police. He was put in jail anyway.

Writer: Adrian Tse & Chet Chetchotisak

The Art of Smelling: Man Steals 100 Girls Panties

In Courtesy of Thairath

CHONBURI – Police arrested a pervert with a stockpile of girls’ panties and bras in his apartment. He admitted to smelling them for arousal and masturbation.

The man lived a unique lifestyle. He would go to work at a convenient store in the morning until afternoon. On the way home, he would search for an attractive apartment building, scale the side of it, and hop around back balconies stealing underwear’s that smelt interesting.

He admitted to taking them all home and spreading them all over his apartment floor; wallowing in them and rolling around in the panties until he got an erection. Those were the good days when he would throw the panties into the air like a self-made millionaire.

But the man’s glory days are over – for now anyway.

Writer: Adrian Tse & Chet Chetchotisak

Superstar Panda: Lin Ping

In Courtesy of Thairath

CHIANG MAI – The Zoo extended Lin Ping’s show due to high demand. Each show, the arena is packed with thousands of people waiting to see the little panda climb a tree.

After the establishment of Lin Ping’s 24 hour reality TV show, Lin Ping has developed a tight fan base of which visit the zoo from cities all over Thailand. A large group has requested an extension of the show because they came all the way to Chiang Mai but didn’t get to see Lin Ping.

The Head of Panda Foundation Thailand said that Lin Ping has been amazingly influential in extending happiness to people. The Zoo’s telephone lines and internet talk boards are full of requests for more Lin Ping shows.

It’s amazing what Lin Ping's marketing machine has done to capture an entire nation of people.

Writer: Adrian Tse & Chet Chetchotisak

Pick-Up Truck Takes One Monk and One Man

In Courtesy of Khaosod

PHUKET – Sad news in the early morning: a young man came out to put offerings into a monk’s bowl (Tak Baat) and was killed along with the monk by a speeding pick-up truck. At the time, the monk had been ritualizing a birthday prayer.

The driver is on the lam but police found a bank book in the vehicle with a name: Somporn Gaewprasert.

Monk Samarn Narakae, 60-years-old, died instantly.

Next to the monk’s body, lay the young 23-year-old male victim. Paramedics were unable to revive either of the men.

Writer: Adrian Tse & Chet Chetchotisak

2000 Monks Stand as One

In Courtesy of Thairath

CHANTHABURI – Politicians, merchants, and civilians participated in a Buddhist event by placing food offerings into monks’ bowls, known as Tak Baat. Two thousand monks partook to raise hope for people affected by the civil war in south Thailand.

The congregation of monks lined up in two neat rows which extended over 800 meters. With the wish of maintaining the positive development and growth of Buddhism in Thailand, thousands joined the ceremony over the weekend; the atmosphere was lively amidst the colder weather.

The image above shows the event in action.

Writer: Adrian Tse & Chet Chetchotisak

Sinkhole In The Middle Of Pattaya

In Courtesy of Thairath

BANGKOK – PATTAYA – Police warned civilians of a collapsed sinkhole in the middle of a road entering Pattaya. One unfortunate victim made a dive into the sink with his motorbike and is now in a coma.

The hole intensified traffic conditions, squeezing the main road into one lane. A traffic officer on site said the dip was three meters deep, nine meters square in area and extremely dangerous.

Another victim was the driver of a semi-trailer delivering soda drinks; he managed to miss the hollow but in quick steering, swerved and tipped the vehicle.

Road specialists said that the structure under the roadway had been struck by underground water from a pipe and sea water 200 meters away, causing the soil mantle beneath the ground to dissolve over time and the cavern roof to collapse.

Writer: Adrian Tse & Chet Chetchotisak

Is this Japanese BBQ?

In Courtesy of Thairath

PHUKET – An unidentified person was burnt alive in their vehicle in the middle of Phuket. The age, sex and nationality of the person could not be identified because the fire left only ashes.

The owner of the car – a Japanese woman – owns a vehicle care business, and her husband has gone missing. It is believed that the husband is what we now see as ashy bones.

The fire took 30 minutes to die down; the Honda Civic was nothing more than a brittle chassis. The rescue team picked up three teeth in the vehicle and a blood-stained shirt 200 meters away from the scene.

Police deduced that the t-shirt belonged to the culprit responsible for killing the man.

The night of the crime, civilians reported seeing the vehicle pass the area a few times and someone telling the man in the vehicle that it was dead end and that the car could not go on. A while after that, the vehicle was found on fire.

Police suspect the culprits must have killed the victim and brought the corpse to the vehicle to set on fire.

Police believe there are more than two culprits and that they must be from somewhere else because they were not familiar with the roadway running into a dead end. The blood-stained shirt is still a mystery.

Writer: Adrian Tse & Chet Chetchotisak

Teacher’s Punishment

In Courtesy of Thairath

PICHIT – When a little 2nd grader couldn’t remember his times tables, he received a punishment from his lady teacher. She pinched his face and twisted his ears, giving him bruises; she grabbed his legs and hung him upside down and smacked his head on the ground. The boy’s parents informed police.

After an investigation, it was discovered that the teacher had done this kind of punishment many times before, hanging kids upside down and banging their heads against the ground – preferably a concrete ground – but this time, when the boy cried in pain, she ignored him and continued.

The teacher refused to admit her cruelty against the boy, saying that she had given homework to everyone and that the task was to say the times table out loud to her the next morning. Only the boy could not do it, for example, he said “3X3 is 3 or 5X5 is 5.” The teacher was infuriated by the child’s inability to recite the multiplications table.

Charges are yet to be laid after further inquiry.

Writer: Adrian Tse & Chet Chetchotisak

One-Year-Old Grilled By Stepfather

In Courtesy of Khaosod

SONGKLA – A stepfather showered his wife’s 1-year-old with fuel and lit the child on fire. The boy was reduced to ashes.

After an altercation between the culprit and his wife regarding an ex-husband, jealousy led the culprit to go out and drown himself in alcohol, before returning home late that night. He found his wife sleeping; found the child and doused him in fuel, lit a match and made a fire.

The wife woke up in shock and managed to run from the burning house. The wife’s 16-year-old sister and her 13-year-old brother suffered severe injuries from the fire.

Eight emergency fire trucks arrived at the premises to try and stop the fierce fire. The firemen took around an hour to suppress the fire and rescued the burn victims from underneath the staircase. The neighbor’s house was half burnt as well.

Warunee Kongmak, 23-years-old, the mother of the dead child said that her husband also lit furniture in the house on fire before running away. She, in panic, ran out of the house to call the police and forgot that the boy and her siblings were still stuck inside. Fortunately the siblings survived with burns to both their arms and face.

Writer: Adrian Tse & Chet Chetchotisak

City Minister Announces Pig VS Buffalo VS Human Tournament

NONTHABURI – Nonthaburi province is hosting a festival swim race between a pig, buffalo, and human. The city minister said that the pig participating in the race this year is well-trained in swimming and that nobody should underestimate it. The pig loves to eat vegetables and is known as the “Vegie King.” The buffalo on the other hand is a running champion and is constantly training for endurance and speed. Will the human stand a chance?

The minister said the human participants will be Khao Sai Galaxy, a world renowned Thai boxer who has retired, in addition to a well-known soccer player. The minister is confident to say that the two won’t stand a chance against the animals. The race was held 20 years ago, and the humans lost as well.

Authorities from the Ministry of Animal Protection have come out to say that such an event is a form of torture to the animals. Nonthaburi city minister however said that the two animals are beloved pets of their owners; they are well-taken care of and are spirited to participate – and that it is definitely not a form of torture.

“Many people have trained their dogs and elephants to swim and race. So why can we not train pigs and buffaloes to swim as well? If I pick up a random pig and throw it into the pool then that’s torture. But the pig and buffalo are both eminent athletes of our town,” said the city minister.

The opposing side however argued that the pigs and buffaloes are not swimming animals and that this race is forcing them against their nature. They also said that people can’t just get random things and throw an event to grab people’s attention. They added that it’s immoral and will be a bad image to the country.

To this Nonthaburi’s City Minister replied: “Wait till you see the these animals swim. They’re Nonthaburi’s mermaids.”

Writer: Adrian Tse & Chet Chetchotisak