City Minister Announces Pig VS Buffalo VS Human Tournament

NONTHABURI – Nonthaburi province is hosting a festival swim race between a pig, buffalo, and human. The city minister said that the pig participating in the race this year is well-trained in swimming and that nobody should underestimate it. The pig loves to eat vegetables and is known as the “Vegie King.” The buffalo on the other hand is a running champion and is constantly training for endurance and speed. Will the human stand a chance?

The minister said the human participants will be Khao Sai Galaxy, a world renowned Thai boxer who has retired, in addition to a well-known soccer player. The minister is confident to say that the two won’t stand a chance against the animals. The race was held 20 years ago, and the humans lost as well.

Authorities from the Ministry of Animal Protection have come out to say that such an event is a form of torture to the animals. Nonthaburi city minister however said that the two animals are beloved pets of their owners; they are well-taken care of and are spirited to participate – and that it is definitely not a form of torture.

“Many people have trained their dogs and elephants to swim and race. So why can we not train pigs and buffaloes to swim as well? If I pick up a random pig and throw it into the pool then that’s torture. But the pig and buffalo are both eminent athletes of our town,” said the city minister.

The opposing side however argued that the pigs and buffaloes are not swimming animals and that this race is forcing them against their nature. They also said that people can’t just get random things and throw an event to grab people’s attention. They added that it’s immoral and will be a bad image to the country.

To this Nonthaburi’s City Minister replied: “Wait till you see the these animals swim. They’re Nonthaburi’s mermaids.”

Writer: Adrian Tse & Chet Chetchotisak